When I was a wee toddler in the wilds of far flung hobbiton, our parents were cunning enough to employ cats to assist them with our upbringing. And up we were brung, myself and three older brothers.
When a cat is part of your home, it brings a whole new dynamic that is all too familiar to anyone who’s had the pleasure of engaging with these pharaohed felines.
My first cat was an aptly named stray called Lucky and I remember her as somewhat chilled, except when in the throws of violence with our other stray, Treasure. In both, we had the extremes of what I see as their behavioural scale.
Over my life, I’ve been fortunate enough to have had many cat companions. Each one with a unique personality, each one with a definable element that is cat somewhere upon that scale. The chilled lap cats that just lounge seemingly furever, the wired nut that takes pleasure in the pain of others, the hybrid that goes from zero to bat shit in seconds during what appeared to be a nice patting session and your hand is often left shredded in ribbons.
I like how some cats favour passive aggression over anything as crass as violence, choosing to ignore you, meow for no reason or just stare daggers at you.
I’ve also had my fair share of mild mannered critters that had traits more becoming of Mafioso than mere cat. They ultimately want to be fed, patted and provided with a dry bed, but on their terms. If it’s not, they’ll befriend the neighbour and claim political asylum, convincing them of unimaginable neglect.
If you have other animals, more often than not there’s a mutual understanding that the cat’s the boss, established with the lightning slap from one of their cactus clawed mitts. Our leaders know that fear is a good motivator, cats do too.
If you look in early dictionaries, under Haughty, it says “see Cat”. They take the high ground morally and literally, opting to leer at you from lofty heights.
It’s widely rumoured that the first ninja was actually a cat riding a human. Feats of profound silence and stealth are synonymous with their brand.
Who hasn't aspired to be “a cool cat”? There’s a Mayor Cat. They even make great self-cleaning tea towels in the kitchen and have shown the soft side of firemen.
Sadly, not everyone likes cats, but they don’t give a rats. They reserve rat giving for those they truly love, bringing in poorly plated up presents to show you they really care.
If cats were people, they’d be quite a challenge to deal with.
I’ve learned a lot from living with cats. For me, the most important lesson you learn with a cat is that of consequence itself. According to Mewtons Law, every action with a cat, has a sometimes equal but mostly disproportionate reaction. Push a cat off something, it will push all of your somethings off. Flick your pee on a cat, it will pee on something important of yours. Piss them off, they’ll light you up. Cats love an unbalanced ledger.
Having an eco dog without an eco cat would lead to unrest in our house, so after much kneading and purring, we’re excited to announce that the eco cat is now here, rubbing against your legs, meowing so loud it demands to be heard, not herded.
So follow this link and check out the range. You don’t even need to own a cat to buy our products, although we do recommend them to appreciate the full experience.
Meow for now.